Let’s talk about Emotions, Feelings & Expressions.
One day, I told Yajur, I can see that little frown on your face. Are you angry or are you just having a bad day? …..
The little 4-year-old gave me an answer that is not relevant, but it got me thinking about the number of complicated concepts I put into that one question. I had asked him about his facial expression, his feelings, and his emotions (in that order) all at once!
So yes, my simple question had all of this packed in and I was expecting a 4-year-old to answer me.
Irrespective of where you come from or who you are, emotions are something that you cannot run away from. If there is no escape, as kids are we taught about emotions? Our minds and bodies just feel something, and we are left to deal with it. And this has happened over generations, so it must be the way it should be right? Unless there is a better way…..
Without overthinking, overanalyzing, or overdoing anything, I believe that there is value in talking to kids about emotions, feelings, and facial expressions because when anything is spoken about it clears a lot of assumptions and miscommunication. Kids can be equipped to understand their own emotions better and even find ways to deal with them.
You may ask why, especially because we are all doing ‘well enough’ in dealing with it, and our parents did not need to work so hard on all these things. But, yes there is a BUT….how many people in your close circles do you know today that are dealing with emotional issues? It could be depression, aggression, moody behavior, and more. Some are clinically treated and some are ignored, but they exist. And with more people (young people) going through these issues, it is important that we nurture kids and equip them with information that they can use in the ‘real world out there.
If you have reached this portion of this article and are still reading, I would love to share how I started talking about these concepts with Yajur.
Everyday situations give us enough and more context to make conversations about how we are feeling. When we consciously observe our behavior we can connect them to emotions and talk about how our responses are because of those emotions. A simple conversation with a kid after school will explain how she/he is feeling on that specific day, what emotions are triggered when they are away from you and their expressions can tell you stories! All you need to do is be in the moment and listen.
Another easy way to teach kids about these concepts is trying to create a situation that brings up an feeling that they may be unfamiliar with. For example ‘disappointment’; is something we all feel but most of us do not know how to deal with it. What if we could create simple situations with our kids and give them some delayed gratification so they understand the feeling and learn to deal with it right with our help? Perhaps in the future, with bigger disappointments, they can be better equipped!?
There is another simple way I found to speak about feelings and this time associate it well with facial expressions — through books! Illustrations can speak a thousand words and what a lovely way to introduce kids to expressions that they can relate to, connect with and learn to recognize. They can showcase their own feeling better and even be receptive to people they see around them and understand those feelings. I loved how one day Yajur saw a friend looking at two shoes and told me ‘I think she is confused about which one to wear; he picked the right feeling of ‘confusion’ in the apt situation.
Because we love books and I wanted to bring about the idea of teaching kids concepts through books, I wrote a story that highlights multiple emotions, feelings, and expressions the character goes through and the Illustrator, Aanchal Kejriwal has beautifully brought them to life in the book — Hairdresser in a Hairless Town. You can get a copy on Amazon 🙂
My favorite way to teach kids about emotions is through play. And when we think of play, what better than board games? You may be surprised to know that there are board games for kids as young as1–2 years too! Board games, can teach kids to wait for their turn (patience); understand that they may not get things right sometimes (failure & disappointment); do something better (competitive & sportsman spirit); keep doing something consistently (determination), and small successes (ambition, accomplishment & fulfillment!)
Would love to know your thoughts on understanding emotions with kids. Share them in the comments.
Originally published at https://yajurchronicles.com on August 27, 2022.
